Old Souls Page 6
A shiver raced down my spine when she whispered, “Please.”
It was the only word she voiced, but her eyes said so much more. Do it, they begged. Somehow she knew why I was here and she wanted this, desperately.
“I can’t,” I whispered in a broken voice.
“Please.” Though she spoke only one word, it cost her. She winced in pain and my heart cracked a little. Even such a simple thing as a whispered word caused her discomfort. That’s when I knew I was going to go through with this. I nodded my head, answering the silent plea I saw in her eyes. She sighed as if relieved, smiled, and closed her eyes again. It was almost as if she realized how difficult this was for me while she watched.
I leaned back down and said in a low voice, “I hope you find peace.” Placing my hand on her forehead, I concentrated on drawing the energy from her. It took only seconds before I felt the last spark of life escape her. It was easier than I thought it would be, the act itself. The guilt was another matter.
As we drove away from the hospice, the biting sting of tears rose quickly in my throat, but I managed to swallow it down. Though I sat staring out the window on the passenger side of the car, I didn’t actually see any of the scenery that passed. The only thing I saw was that woman’s eyes. Their dull, grey color was burned forever in my memory.
I’m a murderer. My breath stuttered and my chest constricted as the thought struck me.
Never in my life had I felt such a crushing sense of shame and guilt. It didn’t matter what rationalizations I made, what I’d done was wrong. I swallowed down the tight lump again and squeezed my eyes shut, hoping it would be enough to stave off the tears.
“Would you mind taking me to my apartment?” I couldn’t quite stifle the hitch in my voice. I was too close to breaking down and sobbing. Mark was observant, I’m sure he heard it.
“Yes, I would mind very much.” Mark’s glib response surprised me, not to mention pissed me off.
“Are you saying you won’t take me home?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. You don’t need to be alone right now.”
“What if I want to be alone?” I replied sharply.
“What you want and what you need are two very different things.”
“And why do you get to decide what I need?” I know he meant well, but I was frustrated. I wanted to have a good cry and I didn’t especially want him around to see it.
“Alyssa.” He blew out a deep breath and reached for my hand. “You can get mad at me all you want, but I know what you’re going through right now. I’ve been exactly where you are. Your emotions are raw, but you don’t have to deal with that alone. I won’t let you be alone right now.”
A knot formed in my throat, it was hard not to be touched by his words. I was annoyed at him for his domineering attitude, but he was doing it because he understood and wanted to be there for me. How could I be angry with him for that? And if I was being honest with myself, he was right. I didn’t really want to be alone. I thought about it and then nodded my head in agreement. “Okay.”
“Okay.” He squeezed my hand and I turned back to my window. Silence filled the car the rest of the way to his place. It was a constant battle to hold myself back from letting my emotions free. Finally, a few minutes after we entered his condo, I couldn’t hold it in any longer. It was like the damn just burst. My legs gave out and I crumpled to the floor. Mark’s powerful arms lifted me and I buried my head in his chest, sobbing uncontrollably. He carried me to the sofa and sat, draping me across his lap. With my arms wound around his neck, my body pressed tight against his, I cried.
“Let it out, baby.”
He stroked my hair with such compassion. His touch bolstered my strength and helped to soothe my grief, making what had once felt unendurable, bearable. We sat that way for what felt like an eternity. I’m not sure how much time had actually passed, but I eventually managed to calm myself. Patiently, he waited as I slowly went from retching sobs to slight hiccups in my breath. Murmuring comforting words, and never once uttering a single word of complaint. He would have sat like that all night if I needed him to.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to break down like that.” My voice sounded rough and gravelly.
He handed me a Kleenex and I wiped my eyes. “Don’t be. Believe me, I understand.”
Oh God. He’d insinuated it earlier, but the way he was looking at me right now confirmed it. Staring into a face filled with pain, I realized he knew exactly what it felt like to take a life. Silently, new tears began to fall down my cheeks. This time, I cried for him.
His gaze, etched with tenderness, roamed to my tears. Then he did something that twisted up my insides and had goose bumps breaking out over my flesh. He leaned in and licked the salty fluid from my cheek. “I wish I could take away your pain as easily.” He murmured.
My heart swelled at his words and I kissed him. At first, just a gentle caress, a simple brushing of mouths in a fleeting touch. Once, twice, three times. He moaned, threaded his fingers through my hair and pulled me closer as he deepened the kiss. And when I felt his tongue meet my own, my entire body melted into him. Kissing me slowly, he prolonged it, teasingly, before pulling back.
His eyes never deviated from mine as he reached for the hem of my shirt, holding it…waiting. He said nothing, but the look he slanted me was both hopeful and hesitant. He was giving me a chance to stop him, but hoping that I wouldn’t.
I didn’t.
Instead, I raised my hands. His face broke into a huge grin as he pulled the material free from my body and tossed it to the floor. My bra followed shortly after. It felt like this was happening so fast, but also like I’d been waiting forever. My emotions were so enflamed, I needed this. I needed him. I’d never really comprehended the gravity of the word need before, but when he put his hands on me I finally understood. Mark’s touch was as necessary to my existence as my next breath.
Staring at me, his blue eyes seemed even darker than usual as they burned with hunger. Cupping my breast in his palm, he maintained eye contact as he brought his mouth, slowly—achingly so—to my nipple. Jolts of electricity sizzled through my body as his tongue peeked out and circled the outer rim before sucking it deep into his mouth.
“God, that feels amazing.” I exhaled.
My head fell back and I closed my eyes, drowning in the ecstasy of his tongue on my skin. And while his mouth left a trail of heat behind everywhere it touched, my hands greedily explored the planes of hard, muscular flesh. He began to alternate nibbling bites with the wet caresses of his mouth moving up my chest, over my neck and settling on my ear. His hot, moist breath wafted across my skin. “Just so we don’t misinterpret anything, I intend to bury myself deep inside you tonight.”
His words sent a shockingly intense jolt of arousal through my body. A shiver overtook me at the same time moisture pooled at the juncture between my thighs. My response was delivered breathlessly. “Just so we’re clear, I intend to let you.”
His mouth was on mine again as he stood quickly, lifting me along with him. I wrapped my legs around his waist and let him carry me. It seemed to take forever to reach his bedroom. He stopped, pressing me against the wall and kissing me senseless so many times along the way I lost count. Every time he did, my hands locked in his hair and pulled him ravenously to me. I was starving for him. We finally made it to the bedroom, both panting and impatient.
“Off.” He growled, edgily, as he hooked his fingers into the sides of my pants.
“Bossy.” I countered, smiling. What can I say, his bossy turned me on.
I removed my pants quickly, and when I looked up again and took in the sight of his naked body for the first time. My mouth was suddenly as dry as the Sahara. I knew he was impressive, but this was so much better than anything I’d imagined—and believe me, I’d imagined a lot.
His skin was the perfect shade of golden bronze. His body, strong and athletic, defined with muscle—he actually had a perfect six-pack of abs. And,
oh my God, the sexy vee of his hipbones had my hands suddenly itch to touch him. My mouth watered in anticipation of tracing every one of his taut muscles and delineated lines with my tongue.
“Something wrong?” Amusement filled his voice.
“Absolutely nothing.”
He grinned, stepping toward me with the dangerous gleam of a predator in his eye. My knees hit the back of the bed and he pushed me, gently, until I was lying on my back. “I feel like I’ve been waiting a lifetime for this,” he said, inching over me.
We hadn’t known each other long, but I suddenly couldn’t remember a single detail of my life before I met him. “Me too,” I returned, eyes locked onto his.
He lowered his weight carefully and nudged my legs apart. I thought he was going to kiss me, but instead he simply stared. The look on his face was more than hunger, more than simple desire. It was possession, mixed with…reverence. I couldn’t remember a time in my life anyone had ever looked at me like this.
“Perfect.” He whispered. His eyes fixed on mine for a long immeasurable moment—like time had stopped while we were protected in this moment. His thumb stroked my cheek and lips, and not once did his eyes stray. Not for a second. It was the most profound moment of my life. I wasn’t a virgin, I’d had sex before, but never had I felt so connected to another person, and that was before he entered me.
Slowly, he edged his way closer until finally, I felt him press inside me. He pushed his hips inexorably forward, filling me completely, while simultaneously taking my mouth in a blatant show of possession. It was pure dominance and had me kissing him back with abandon, surrendering completely. Eventually he broke the kiss and moaned. “God you feel good. So right.”
He pulled out and hovered for a minute. “Stop teasing me.” I demanded.
“Now who’s bossy?” He chuckled.
I was about to give a smart reply when he thrust inside hard and I lost all ability to think. All I could do was scream, “God, yes!”
He began a steady rhythm, and on every inward stroke I felt my inner muscles clenching tighter and tighter. Still, it was never quite enough. That is, until he lifted his upper body and I felt his hand reach between us. His thumb locked on with unerring accuracy to the exact right spot and started to move in small circles while he continued pumping into me. Sucking in a lungful of air, I shouted as every muscle in my body suddenly constricted and then released, throbbing uncontrollably. It was pure heaven.
“That’s it baby, come while I’m inside you.”
His words, so explicit and full of arousal, had me igniting in another climax as soon as I’d come down from the first. This one felt different, more powerful than the first. Every nerve in my body tensed and exploded again until I lost all control. My hands fisted the sheets and I couldn’t hold back my scream. My body gripped him tightly, holding him inside me as I had the most mind blowing orgasm of my life. My entire body trembled from the force of it.
“Fuck,” he growled, “that’s so good.” His movements stilled and he let out a long groan, trembling above me.
After another endless amount of time passed, he pulled out slowly and collapsed on the bed next to me. We both panted as he cradled my head in the curve of his arm, arms and legs tangled.
We lay like that, peacefully, for some time while he ran his fingers up and down my arm. Now that my brain wasn’t being scrambled by his drugging kisses and devastating touches, I had time to think again. I started thinking about everything that had happened the past few days, and I remembered the questions I wanted to ask earlier until we were sidetracked.
“Mark, how were my powers activated?”
His hand stilled and he said nothing for so long I thought he wasn’t going to answer, but eventually, he did. “Every single person alive has the potential to develop the powers we possess.”
“How do you mean?”
“At one time, every human being was born a witch. It was ingrained in who we were. Unfortunately, too many were unable to handle the gift. They cared nothing about balance and risked plunging our world into chaos.”
His hands continued stroking me and he pulled me closer, kissing my forehead. I was so comfortable and content I almost didn’t want to hear any more, but he continued, and I needed to know.
“There are three witches—brothers—the oldest in our history. No one knows exactly where they came from or how it all began—only that they were the first and they have always ruled over us. They maintain order and balance in nature. As one, their powers are the same as any witch, but the three have the ability to combine their power making them stronger than any witch ever born.”
“What if another three witches worked together?” I asked, curiously.
“Some have tried but it’s never been successful. Something about when the three of them come together is a power in itself.”
My body trembled at the thought of that much power lying solely in the hands of three men. “It’s a frightening thought. They could literally do whatever they wanted and no one could stop them.”
“Alyssa, they’ve been alive longer than anyone can imagine and have only ever acted to protect us. But ultimately, they’re not truly immortal either. I’m sure if they lost control we’d find a way to stop them. The one thing I’ve learned, nature never allows for imbalance. Everything has to have a weakness.”
Running his hand slowly up and down my back, his touch soothed me as much as his words. He was right, no sense in worrying about problems before they arose. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt. So, tell me what the three brothers have to do with how my powers were activated.”
“Once people began to abuse their gifts, they stepped in to do something about the misuse of power before it was too late. Unwilling to destroy something so precious, they decided instead to neutralize our abilities, rendering humans powerless.”
“Neutralize how?”
His brow pulled as he considered the question carefully before answering. “You know how we can sense a life force?”
“Yes.”
“Some people call it a soul, but no matter what you call it, it’s where our power is derived. The three brothers created a spell to split that life force and divided the one soul among two bodies. Once the soul was separated, the other half was reborn and both halves became powerless.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Our souls are incomplete without both halves, which makes our abilities nonfunctional and useless. It was the only way to remove the power without destroying it.”
“Okay, I must be missing something, how does any of what you’re explaining make either of us a witch?”
“A witch is simply a term we use to for those of us who have their power returned.”
“Okay, but—”
“Our powers,” he interrupted my question, “are activated only when we find our other half.” Intently, he stared at me, trying to convey…something.
“Wait,” I hesitated, my voice wavering a bit at the end. “Are you saying we only get our powers when we find our…soul mate?”
“Yes.”
“But that means… I have a soul mate?”
“Yes.”
He didn’t elaborate. He simply waited for me to come around to my own conclusions. Silence hung between us as I thought about everything he’d said. Then, I just knew…it was the draw that pulled me to him. “You?”
He nodded.
Holy.
Crap.
Soul mate?
“Oh my God.” I sat up and pulled the sheet across my chest to cover myself.
“Are you okay?” he asked, sitting up next to me.
Not trusting my voice, I nodded.
“How…why…I don’t—” I didn’t know what to say, but finally asked the one question that had bothered me from the moment we met. “So then, why were you angry with me when we met?”
“I wasn’t angry with you, Alyssa.” His words were so tender. He tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear and contin
ued to explain. “I was ecstatic, excited, overwhelmed, scared, and a million other things. I wanted to lift you up and kiss you senseless, but I knew that would scare you so I held back. I was angry, but not at you. I was angry that I couldn’t do everything I wanted to.”
I ran my hand through my hair. “I— I don’t really know what to say.”
“So don’t say anything, just lay here with me.”
And we did. We lay there, arms and legs entwined, constantly touching each other like we’d never been touched before. It was the most content I’d felt in my life. We fell asleep like that… and that’s when the tranquility evaporated.
Chapter 7
Nightmares
Along with the good dreams about Mark that began when I started my new job, I’d also been plagued by nightmares that had become increasingly more frightening. Well, it was only one nightmare really, a recurring nightmare. And it was back, different though…worse somehow. It almost felt like my subconscious was trying to tell me something.
Lucid dreaming, I think that’s what they call it, when you’re sleeping but you know you’re dreaming. The moment I saw that terrifyingly familiar face staring down at me, I knew I was dreaming again. Still, knowing it wasn’t real didn’t stop the physical reaction that followed. My heart thundered in my ears, my breathing became labored, and adrenaline suddenly poured through my body, leaving a nauseous feeling deep in the pit of my stomach.
Why was it always him?
His eyes shone black and utterly flat, unfettered by emotion. Cold and ruthless, his cruel gaze held mine and conveyed one simple, unarguable message: You are going to die.
Screaming would’ve been a great idea, but no sound ever escaped my mouth when I tried. Hard to make noise with a hand crushing your larynx. Uselessly, I clawed and scratched, trying to free myself from the vice-like grip. I was still breathing, barely, but that wasn’t what had me so terrified. No, the chill settling deep into my bones was something else entirely. It was fear. Fear from the knowledge of what his hand around my neck was doing to me. I had never recognized it the previous times when I’d had the nightmare, but I had never experienced that feeling before. Now I had, once with Colin and the second time with the woman in the hospice. It was only twice but still, I knew what was happening. He was killing me, draining the life from me.